Sunday, September 28, 2014

The Personification of Days—Which Day are You?

If you've been following these posts on facebook, thanks for humoring me. I wrote this because I believe every day is some kind of holiday. Have you noticed that the days of the week seem to have different personalities? You haven't? Well, they do. These might describe someone you know. Or someone I know. ;) Which day are you?

Once upon a time, it was Sunday. Sunday sends birthday cards to people she hasn't seen in years, eats only gluten free and vegetarians foods, and can sing even the most cantankerous baby to sleep in minutes. Sunday gives almost half her salary to charity and is the only one who is nice to Monday. Friday often calls her a "goody two-shoes." Sunday replies, "Well, that is better than a goody one-shoe." Her jokes aren't very good. Sunday is kind and pleasant all day... until around 9 p.m. when she remembers all the tasks she didn't accomplish. Then she turns crazy. Rumor has it she has even—on occasion—directed a few snide comments at Monday.
(Sunday would like to remind you that she is the first day of the week, not the last. Happy Sunday and God bless.)

Once upon a time, it was Monday. Monday is often sarcastic and is known for being cynical. He tends to brood about his past and watch his surroundings with suspicion. Sometimes he wishes he had friends, but then he remembers he would have to talk to people. And people are stupid. You know that cruel (but funny) meme you saw on the Internet? Monday probably created it. Monday enjoys sending the world into a state of panic and despair. Though the sun rises like every morning, darkness seems to shroud the minds and hearts of those who rise from this beds. But eventually they always remember that we get to move on to Tuesday, but Monday never does. We drink coffee and smile.
(Bring it on, Monday. We're not scared of you. And we know you secretly watch Disney Channel and purchase groceries for your elderly neighbor.)

Once upon a time, it was Tuesday. Now, Tuesday, is Monday's little brother. Everyone dislikes Monday so much that even if Tuesday misbehaves, no one seems to notice. Tuesday likes to pull pranks, such as telling you that you forgot to turn in work on Monday. (This is doubly fun for Tuesday because it annoys you AND Monday.) He's unnaturally energetic and doesn't like to sleep. When it's Tuesday, we might be slightly groggy from the first weekday, but we drive to work anyway, this time remembering to pack a lunch and thank the Lord we have a job. Tuesday is a little weasel; for some reason we don't mind him. We drink coffee and pretend to be productive.
(Hello, Tuesday. Do your worst.)

Once upon a time, it was Wednesday. Now, Wednesday is a bit prideful; she likes to point out that she is not only the middle of the work week but also the middle of the ENTIRE week. She is a bit snotty and vain. Wednesday loves that little children have trouble spelling her name. And she HATES that someone gave her the nickname "Hump Day." By the time Wednesday rolls around, we are in a groove, and we've accepted that we're living through a work week. Some of us may hate to admit it, but we actually like Wednesdays.
("MIKE MIKE MIKE MIKE MIKE MIKE MIKE MIKE! Guess what day it is?! HUMP DAY!" Do something, Wednesday.)

Once upon a time, it was Thursday. Thursday is the most unappreciated of the seven. He watches the world through his jet black bangs and scribbled furiously into his journal whilst listening to depressing music. Thursday doesn't cause much trouble and is actually a pretty nice guy; also, you wouldn't expect it, but he can sing impressive tenor harmony when it's applicable. We don't anticipate Thursday, but we don't dread it, either. Everyone wants to rush past poor Thursday to get to his older, cooler brother, Friday.
(I like you, Thursday. Don't listen to the haters.)

Once upon a time, it was Friday. Friday is the type of guy who can look cool doing anything, even if it's just putting on socks or eating an ice cream cone. And let's face it—NO ONE looks cool eating an ice cream cone. He gets the right number of ice cubs from the dispenser on the first try. The bus driver would wait for him, but Friday never takes the bus. The party starts when he walks in, even if originally no party was going to happen. The only girl who won't go out with him is Wednesday. The only person Friday openly hates is Rebecca Black. He's a lot of fun when he's there, but he's never around when you need him most.
(Happy Friday. Gotta love him.)

Once upon a time, it was Saturday. Saturday has lots of friends, loves Nutella, and believes in the healing power of Netflix. She has started 52 Pinterest crafts but never finished one. (Expect for that one time her sister Sunday made Pinterest cupcakes shaped liked Cookie Monster. Saturday "finished" those.) Saturday falls asleep during movies, class and occasionally rock concerts. But she doesn't often go to rock concerts unless she can wear her pajamas. She has never been awake before noon.
(Hello, Saturday, We like you even though you only last 8 hours. It's not your fault.)

I'm Tuesday. ;)

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